newsflash: yoga pants are comfortable

Read the link: A really important article about slut shaming and dress codes. 

This is why when I see ridiculous dress codes, or ones enforced randomly (or not so random, but against girls who are generally more developed than others because kids grow at different rates) I get so infuriated.

Dress codes and enforcement send horrible messaging to ALL KIDS:

1. Boys can't help themselves. Ergo they have zero responsibility.
2. It's up to girls to police both sexes. Even though it's damned impossible to control someone else.
3. It's girls' fault if something bad happens/they asked for it with their attire.
4. Sex is something that is given--not in a loving, healthy way, but in a controlling way.
5. Girls are here on earth to please boys/men.
6. Girls have an obligation to please boys/men in all ways.
7. Boys' experiences in school is more important than girls' experiences.
8. Girls should feel ashamed of their bodies if they're too sexy/not sexy enough... also, that however their bodies do/n't please men and boys at the right time should shame them. They should try to figure out what boys/men want at any given time.
9. An extremely damaging focus on the body rather than the mind.
10. Girls' needs and wants and self expression are secondary to boys/men's needs and wants.

Dress codes are reactionary and lazy, enforcing them after the fact or denying (usually a girl) access to a school event because of her clothes is unfair and accomplishes nothing but hurt and embarrassment. Here's another newsflash: Teenage boys AND girls think about sex. A lot. Part of growing up is to learn how to control those sometimes overwhelming desires. So I respectfully submit to schools struggling with dress codes, how about y'all do what you do best? TEACH.

How about classes for girls teaching them self-control is exactly that: SELF - control. And that women are not on this earth for males. That everybody's brains and emotions and self expression are important and valid. And that nothing others do or think has to do with their dress, behavior, or them at all. That she is responsible for the behavior of one person: HERSELF.

How about classes for boys teaching them self-control is exactly that: SELF - control. And that women are not on this earth for males. That everybody's brains and emotions and self expression are important and valid. And that nothing others do or think has to do with their dress, behavior, or them at all. That he is responsible for the behavior of one person: HIMSELF.

Might be a start.

2 comments:

siebendach said...

Smartest thing I've read online in a while...

Beth Partin said...

I like the way the advice for girls and boys is almost exactly the same...reinforces your point.