where to?

We've got a chance to bail out of this hellhole for a weekend this March.
(Ok, that's strong language. Actually, if more of you knew how abso-fucking-lutely fabulous it is to live here... well, it wouldn't be because even more of you would move here. Stay out, bastards!)

Rules: must be for a weekend, three days max. Must be continental US. Must have two of three factors: tanning/laying by pool, heavy drinking, something to do. Some of our choices:

California. PHF vetoed this at about "Ca-"

Vegas. Lettt's see, beer in hand for 55 hours straight, wild sex whenever/wherever I want, shows, crazy folk on the street, and a perpetual grin from the inanity of it all. Yeah, it's a contender.

Florida. During spring break that makes oh so many towns we'd have to avoid. However, the tan factor helps push it up there. Perhaps Key West? I can taste the rum punch now, as well as feel the sand between my toes...

South Texas. Never been to Padre. However, PHF frowned over the spring break factor. He just hasn't had time to contemplate the college-aged eye candy. Of course, it goes without saying that it was the first thing to come to my mind.

Chicago. It's been 15 years at least since I stomped my old grounds. Could be fun. Could be cold and shitty weather. Lots of beer and shopping and shit to do though. Hmmm...

New York. Never been. Long flight. Overwhelming for a weekend, perhaps? Could be shitty weather as well. Lots to do, lots to drink.

Aspen. Yes, we could fly there and ski and pahtay with the money types. Or I can sleep in my own bed at the lake and drive 45 minutes to ski for a whole hell of a lot less trouble.

That was all we could come up with tonight. Ideally I want to relax, tan, party at night; or in the case of Vegas, party every single minute and fuck the tan.

Any ideas out there??


14 comments:

Price of Silence said...

Vegas does sound fun, but when are you guys going to learn to dive so we can have some diving partners?

Can you fly somewhere in the Caribbean non-stop? Of course, spring break would be there too.

ssas said...

under the water gives me the heebie jeebies

Greg said...

Sex, I'm offended that PHF canned the California idea. Ya know, I was thinkin about joining your little posse and all but I represent the Wesside Missy. And I see you mentioned New York, so you get on with yourself and your east coast fetish, I'll be chillin down here where the sun is hot and so are the girls.

But if I had to suggest anything, Florida.

T Kwong said...

Not Minnesota.

-Thomas

Goodkingalan said...

Go to Wisconsin, Where they know how to keep the beer cold and plentiful!
(Unfortunately that's all we've got, now that California stole the whole Dairy State thing.)

ssas said...

cryp - i would love to!! (only if you'd buy me a beer and at least *consider* a "playgroup" with PHF and me) but I specified continental US, honeybuns. it looks like greg is not the only one flirting with ADHD.

Greg - PHF makes no secret of the fact that he quite simply loathes California; its inhabitants, companies, the governer, the land itself, the crowds and cars, and all that it represents. it can't drop off the map soon enough. i know a guy who knows a guy who had actually scraped India off his globe because he hated it so much. he just decided it no longer existed for him. i think PHF is about there...

ssas said...

tomilicious - i ruled out MN right off. been there, done that.

Al - long time no hear!! i actually considered Door County, but the flights and such are a pain in the ass and it's off-season. i grew up spending a month in Door County every summer. way fun place.

... as far as the beer; well, hate to break it to ya, but it's icy cold here too. WI cheese rocks.

jake said...

Definitely vegas! Hit the champagne brunch the morning you arrive and drink for free until you leave. There will be tons of "younger" people running around causing all sort of college drama and excitement. I'm going without even booking a hotel. I hope I get lucky.

luke said...

i suggest Alaska. never been there but the brochure looks nice. -thx sheryl crow- you can get out of the freakin contiguous and go see something new and beautiful.

ssas said...

you ain't following the rules. the tix are continental only. trust me, I'd blow out of this country like an h-bomb if I had the chance.

ssas said...

tshilla- thanks for dropping by. NM is too close, we can drive there. Not that we have, but we could.

The Mayor said...

Mitchieville.

ssas said...

looneybin - i can't go til march, man. New Orleans anyway... hmmm, makes a girl think, though. How's it in march?

Honorable Mayor - too damn cold and the politics are all wrong :P

which part of continental UNITED STATES didn't you foreigners get, anyway?

The Mayor said...

First off, Mitchieville is never cold. It is a self-contained metropolis built entirely under a retractable dome. Secondly, well there really isn't a secondly.