Ok, I got eyes in my head. I love the way Brad Pitt looks. His face and hair and body in his early days of acting... yummy. They say symmetrical makes your face look better, and he must be pretty damn symmetrical. He's not too bad now either - though, if it's not obvious by now I kind of prefer guys in their twenties. I refer to looks, you understand, and flirting. Actually talking to a twenty-something guy in a bar makes me want to slam several whiskeys in an effort to sink to their mental capacity. God forbid I actually had to marry one.
And sure, B and J made a cute couple. The way they dyed their hair the same color and their matching, custom wedding rings (I mean, not exactly A for originality there though. PHF's hair and mine are the same color when mine's not dyed, and we had matching wedding bands a full decade before they ever did - along with half the married population). But they had the whole Hollywood Prom King and Queen thing goin' on for awhile. Bully for them.
Do I give a shit that they they broke up? No.
Why do people care? I don't know, but care they do. People are actually discussing this. These are vaguely recalled quotes from actual people that I actually know:
"Oh, that Jen, she just wants a career and no kids. I wish she'd have told him that from the beginning."
"Goddamn that Brad!! He just had to work with Angelina Jolie, and everyone knows she's the kiss of death to any marriage."
"I'm sorry, even if their marriage was in trouble, phone sex with Angelina Jolie was too low." (PHF- If the opportunity ever presents itself I hearby give you permission to have no penalty phone sex with Angelina Jolie.)
"Brad wants kids, and he's been like a surrogate father to Angelina's son."
"Angelina Jolie is a slut. But I'd fuck her."
"Oh, I knew she'd never ruin her body with kids. I said ever since they hooked up that it would never last. Jen is too self-centered."
Oh, I wasn't aware that we actually knew these people. WHY DOES ANYONE CARE??
Actors are by nature self-centered. So are writers. So are computer programmers. So are teachers. We are all self-centered, and actors hardly have a patent on it. Some of us are just better at hiding it than others.
So that means that it's their good looks that attract us. Are we so shallow as to disregard personality in favor of good looks? Apparently. But then, maybe that's for the best. Because like selflessness, personality is a hot commodity in most actors from what I can see. They need to be short on personality so that the script can give them one.
I really don't care about famous people. I have a hard time getting worked up about people I don't know. Who cares who was at which party and what they are supporting and who is pregnant and who is getting married and divorced and least of all why all of it is happening?? Not me. Don't even get me started on when people talk about "what great parents such-and-such actors are," as if we don't all work and raise kids, and most of us with a whole hell of a lot less money.
Deepcleansingbreath. Deepcleansingbreath. Fuck, it's not working. I need to go do something else now. But Goddamn. If I hear another person describing an actor as "down to earth" I'm going to puke all over my People Magazine.