hallowe'en costume ideas

When my husband arrives home from his frequent travels we tend to go to bed at a reasonable hour with good intentions of getting a full night's sleep, and then we lay awake until the wee hours catching up with each other. We chat away until we get sleepy or... well, you get the picture.

Anyway, last night's topic was the upcoming Boo-cchanalia. We got a little slappy giggling over past and present costume ideas. As I've had lots of requests for ideas (usually followed immediately by "You mentioned something about bribing my way in with beer...") I thought I might post a few ideas for y'all. After all, a costume party needs costumes.

And beer. Lots of beer.

Ideas from Halloweens past present and future:

Couples category:
Martha Stewart and Guard combo.
Dirty old man with a bimbo (more specifically, if the little woman is overweight she could be Nicole)

Singles and somewhat tasteless: (couples are overdone,anyway)

White tiger with Roy doll in your mouth

Long Dong Silver. Generic pirate outfit with the addition of lots of silver fexible duct.

Once I dressed in white sweats, cut-out paper snowflakes, and carried popcorn. When they asked me what I was I threw popcorn at them and said "Snowstorm!" The Sig Ep pledges were not amused. (please note: No snowstorms are welcome at Boo-cchanalia!)

Invisible Man. Don't forget your straw!

Transsexual - but look out! We might like you better as the opposite sex! Guys look hot in makeup (enter into evidence: Jack Sparrow) Guys, the Gay Poncho is available that night.

Someone once dressed in a Chipolte t-shirt and apron, wrapped their new baby in tin foil, and the baby was a burrito. Clear evidence that creativity is associated with sleep deprivation.

In the (even more) tasteless category:
(an oldie but goodie) White sheet in ghost fashion, The Who t-shirt on top, and lots of footprints on the sheet.
Tap-dancing old man (see archives of this blog)
Wet t-shirt contest winner
Anyone can do Goth, but how about a noose around your neck or a self-inflicted gunshot wound? Remember, the best costumes have punchlines.

And then some
ideas
truly do require a picture. (errrggg! how come the text is STILL fucked up? I know I seem to be one of those chicks who hate a man to interfere, but right now would be a good time...) I'm wondering if pic #1 got together with ice cream cone lady...

Then, of course the inevitable, somewhat regretable punchiness ensued and with it the following ideas notable for their stupidity:

"You know," the man said, "If we plan it right, we could get some shit done that night."

"How do you mean?"

"Let's encourage our friends to dress up as members of the service industry. Like yardmen, bartenders, maids, window washers..."

"Yeah," I said, warming to the idea, "and don't forget your accessories! Like bags and a rake for the yardmen, alcohol for the bartenders, windex and papertowels for the window washers..."

'nuf said. We were asleep four minutes hence.

Yes, I do have an idea for my costume. Won't say what but it involves a short skirt and combat boots.

cheers.