Lunched at the pub with Punkinhead. She needs a little practice at learning how to go out to eat and not:
1. scream like a banshee
2. run around
3. whine
4. drool sprite down her front
5. eat ketchup with a fork
She made friends, as usual, with the waitress; who said all the predictible things about her curly hair (mine, "yes, it's curly. I straighten it.") her eyebrows (The Man's) and how cute in general she is (she hides the devil inside pretty well for two). The bartender gave her cherries for going peeps on the potty. I love the that place.
I had to laugh last night when I told The Man, "I wish you wouldn't have told her she couldn't take milk to bed. She didn't eat much at dinner."
The Man replied, "So give her milk. I don't care."
"But I don't want to undermine your authoritaiyee."
He snorted. "What authority? She's two, she's the one running things, not us."
As for the post title, the nice people at Victoria Secret actually have a secret! They have all the bras in the dressing room, in every size! No wonder the bras are forty-five bucks each; they got to pay for the overhead. Punkinhead and I were whisked to the largest dressing room and the chick kept coming back to bring me stuff. It was awesome, in a word. Ok, so half of you could care less, but get over yourselves.
Speaking of dudes, I think one saw my boobs. Big thrill for him, I'm sure. No, I'm not being facetious here, I saw his girlfriend. U.G.L.Y.
He was leaning in the doorway of the dressing room waiting for her to open the door to show him whatever she was trying on. There should be a police "Do not cross" line outside that dressing room and a big siren that goes off:
"Woo-up woo-up! Male intruder, step away from the dressing room."
Or maybe they should have to try on some bras. Yeah, I like that better.
Anyway, girlfriends, don't show your man your bra before you buy. He could care less how it looks or if it fits. Most of the guys I know are only interested in how easy the clasp is to undo. (And that was before marriage. Now they really could care less.) I went braless for several years in college and the Man would sometimes tell me (and his friends too, if they were drunk enough). "You're the greatest girlfriend ever!"
No matter how sexy the lingerie, to a man, it's just in the way.
2 comments:
Just wait until she's in junior high. She'll hold up a 42DD and yell at the top of her voice "Mom, I think I found one in your size!" Doesn't matter what size you are, the bigger the bra the better.
Good one. As always!
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